Which whisky is this!?

So this is a hypothetical whisky that you hope could be real?

I'll say ... Laphroaig 32.

@RikS, I don't own this particular whisky, so I made one by following your review specs and being careful to recreate the nose and the palate especially. Your desired dram for tonight would be poured at a higher proof than what you desire if it were left to me to decide..

The first Pure Malt creation ticked almost all of the boxes except that it was not smokey enough to meet your specifications. It was delicious and very much to my liking. The smoke was too subtle, akin to a Highland Park 25 YO Single Malt or Nikka Taketsuru 17 YO Pure Malt. When water was added the smoke was muted. I doubled and then redoubled the Laphroaig ration with Quarter Cask, but an anise note was introduced.

The second Pure Malt creation was amped up. I eliminated the Laphroaig 18 YO, it didn't work well with the substitutes.

Multiple tries later and I've learned that Glenlivet Nadurra 16 YO Batch No. 0712U is the glue that holds this vatting together. **All the boxes have been ticked and your desired dram for this evening is now complete. as you requested, "All in all it has complexity and a lot of elements, but never clashes with itself. However, for its calm, it’s not a slouch. There is happiness and vivaciousness in her, but it’s more ‘old money’ than brash noveau riche". **

My favourite remains the first batch without water. It is not too much of a good thing.

I've taken the liberty of creating a precis of your review (a ruberic was a bit over the top).

N: pronounced element of smoke...but also a rich dark sugary tone that mixes with the fumes. The two, smokiness and sweetness swirl together – the smoke being however the more lingering nose after putting it down for a minute’s rest.

P: first is a certain sweetness, a more serene nature - dark molasses, 90% chocolate and oven apples with a drizzle of thick aged balsamic. oily and viscous - initial sweetness to warm smoke that keeps on building. charred steak and maybe bacon smokiness rich in flavor rather than the sour pungy sweet smokiness - no iodine or medicinal elements… oh wait, yes, there is, but ever so very faintly somewhere in the very back. It has a spicy element too – not the forward peppery pounce of Talisker but something more subdued, maybe a little bit of cinnamon and clove, but no aniseed whatsoever. All in all it has complexity and a lot of elements, but never clashes with itself. However, for its calm, it’s not a slouch. There is happiness and vivaciousness in her, but it’s more ‘old money’ than brash noveau riche.

Pure Malt By Desire #1

Macallan Cask Strength 60.1 % abv, Glenlivet Nadurra 16 YO 55.5%, Laphroaig 18 YO 48%, in the ratio of 8:4:1...stunning at 57.7% abv. With water to 47% it loses a lot of the smoke. Triple the Laphroaig and sub Quarter Cask for 18 YO (slight anise on the finish).

Pure Malt By Desire # 2

Macallan Cask Strength 60.1 % abv, Glenlivet Nadurra 16 YO 55.5%, Longrow CV, Bruichladdich Port Charlotte Scottish Barley Heavily Peated. The finish yielded too much citus, akin to lemon pith. Sub Glendronach Revival for Mac CS. Introduce Laphroaig Cairdeas 2015 (too much anise and lingering citrus after the exit.

Pure Malt By Desire # 3

After some careful consideration of ratios, I decided upon 3:2:1:1, Laphroaig 18YO: Macallan Cask Strength: Glenlivet Nadurra 16 YO, H2O... 45.6% abv.

@paddockjudge now that is some commitment right there! I'm sure you had some fun working through those. Nice work, Sir.

@Hewie, I did have some fun!

I love how much legendary shit there is in there. Laphroaig 18, Mac CS, Nadurra 16, longrow CV and you didn't hesitate to use any of it. Truly a malt lovers pursuit.

@paddockjudge I salute you

@cricklewood I agree. We are not worthy.

BTW, I'd kill for some more of that Laphroaig 18 in the green tube. I'm saving my last one in the white tube for some kind of occasion, which could well be my own funeral, but that green tube version was insanely good.

@BlueNote, Weddings and funerals, the old guys are busy dancing with their daughter, or in the latter case, too stiff to drink. Open that white tube before you kick off.

@paddockjudge @BlueNote or better yet, bring it on a trip to Ontario and we'll "help" you give it a proper sendoff

@Nozinan There’s nothing I’d like better than to share it with you guys and a few other Eastern connosrs.

@paddockjudge Gotcha Mate, Easter weekend might see it cracked.

@BlueNote, I can forego a sip of the white tube Laphroaig 18 YO if it means you will get more. I sincerely hope you get to enjoy this one.

bing.com/videos/search/…

@paddockjudge Thanks for the link. Anyone who hasn't seen a concert in the Royal Albert Hall should put it high up on their bucket list. Doesn't matter if it's rock, jazz or classical, you will be gob smacked by the sheer magnificence of the venue and its incredible acoustics.

@paddockjudge I think WOW! is actually called for! I could have imagined many responses to that question / challenge, hoping for nice ones... and yours wasn't even on the list of what I could have imagined. And yet, the absolutely coolest and most considerate imaginable. Thank you a lot, and I hope you had some fun too! I don't have anywhere near your selection, so it will be a little tricky to replicate this. But hey, what if we start a campaign for you to become the next Master Blender somewhere and you can put it all into one bottle - and I swear; if I can afford it I'll hang on the lock of The Whisky Exchange in Covent Garden at 09:00 to buy it! :)))

@RikS, thanks for the kind words. It was a lot of fun putting that together. I didn't make the component whiskies, only assembled them. It is easy to do when someone else has consistently created excellent whisky thereby enabling you to build on that excellence. John Glaser of Compassbox has been doing this for some time now, and he is very good at it. You might want to try some of his high end offerings.

I should put aside a sample of that vatting, just in case we cross paths.

@MadSingleMalt, after attempting to create the "dream dram" for @RikS, I must say, your olde Laphroaig prediction was right in the wheelhouse as Laphroaig18 was an instrumental part of the vatted malt.

@paddockjudge absolutely! Actually, Canada is one of the places we’d be looking at for a next career move so, it’s a small world and one never knows. I need to reach out again to some of your mineral chaps over there now that i have a dream dram waiting for me!

@RikS If you want minerality with your dream dram, Sudbury is the place to go...

@Nozinan So it seems. Though... maybe something in between? An immediate 'transition'? London > Sudbury could be a rather sharp contrast to the system. I see there's a very high chimney, a big nickel and some gorgeous nature though (the latter admittedly excites me more than the previous two). But on a serious note, yea, I've worked with quite a few Canadians and they have as a rule been great people so maybe...

Please, add your comments and reflections on this one... I still am my quest to identify the next bottle. Though I realise that after @paddockjudge amazing and fantastically entertaining response, it's like going second answering "what did you do over summer?" after the first guy answered "well, first I climbed K2 and then I got the nobel prize in literature"

@RikS Now you have me reading over Serge reviews of 25 year old Talisker's post 2011. It's the "meaty element" that has me wondering if it is a 23 or 21 year old Benrinnes bottling from Diageo special release. Who ever the lady is she is over 18 www.allthingswhisky.com. Then again, your descriptions of this dram evokes more than just a liquid - an event, a place, a time and place. Very well written.

www.allthingswhisky.com an amusing description of 18 year old single malts

correction to post above

@fiddich1980 thank you, and also for the link. Another wealth of info and entertainment to pour over - and cheekily entertaining too! Intersting you referenced the Talisker. I recently got the DE (even wrote a little note on it as review) and i have been surprised how much i appreciate it. Wish you a good evening

@RikS Sudburians, in particular, are incredibly amazing people. People who aren’t from Sudbury, ON, wish they were.

can you guess where I’m from?

@OdysseusUnbound Dollard?

@OdysseusUnbound haha yes I figured so much. And I actually went to the local tourism website. Reminded me of home, (original home, not London)and gosh I do miss being surrounded by beautiful nature and long walks with the dogs. I'm still not fully convinced about the giant coin though... Unless you're gonna tell me now it has a great history behind it

@RikS Sudbury is the Nickel capital of the world. At one point, Sudbury produced about 20% of the world’s nickel...hence the Big Nickel.

@RikS That's no giant coin....

@OdysseusUnbound aha! Ok, that is kinda cute. Fair enough. I stand corrected, ill buy the drinks if we meet. In fact must be nice to have a resource like that in a nice place like that... ive spent most of my life in the “resources” business, but in a lot more challenging and less beautiful places.